Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Monday, October 29, 2007
Thursday, October 18, 2007
i put my faith in you, so much faith.
you know how in psychiatric drama's they make the psychiatrists waiting
room completely white with the few inspirational posters trying to get
you to not kill yourself? that's where i am right now, except i'm not
the patient, i'd much rather be the patient though. my moms in there, i
just got booted out of her office because my mom didn't want me to see
her crying. i honestly don't know what i'm doing half the time anymore
and sometimes i wonder if its because of me or not. am i being selfish
in calling my mom selfish? it feels like everything i do has to be okay
with her schedule or something. i'm 19 and i'm supposed to enjoy this
time of my life yet here i am, in this white room with the receptionist,
a recovering addict and an old man who doesn't even know where he is. i
want to go home and sleep, or at least get away from all this. i wish i
was someone else. has anyone else ever wondered what it feels like to
die? like, how do you just sleep forever? what if you get to experience
life again in another persons form? i guess that's what i think about
when i want to block things out. just the impossible and improbable.
what if there is no jesus, what if everyone's efforts went into vain?
what if all these churches, monestaries, convents, temples, mosques-
what if they're all built and amount to nothing? what if we do just
sleep forever?
-- i speak to you in riddles.
room completely white with the few inspirational posters trying to get
you to not kill yourself? that's where i am right now, except i'm not
the patient, i'd much rather be the patient though. my moms in there, i
just got booted out of her office because my mom didn't want me to see
her crying. i honestly don't know what i'm doing half the time anymore
and sometimes i wonder if its because of me or not. am i being selfish
in calling my mom selfish? it feels like everything i do has to be okay
with her schedule or something. i'm 19 and i'm supposed to enjoy this
time of my life yet here i am, in this white room with the receptionist,
a recovering addict and an old man who doesn't even know where he is. i
want to go home and sleep, or at least get away from all this. i wish i
was someone else. has anyone else ever wondered what it feels like to
die? like, how do you just sleep forever? what if you get to experience
life again in another persons form? i guess that's what i think about
when i want to block things out. just the impossible and improbable.
what if there is no jesus, what if everyone's efforts went into vain?
what if all these churches, monestaries, convents, temples, mosques-
what if they're all built and amount to nothing? what if we do just
sleep forever?
-- i speak to you in riddles.
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Friday, October 05, 2007
Thursday, October 04, 2007
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
Monday, October 01, 2007
why do people let themselves waste?
it's funny how people work- always trying to top someone else and look a badass. no one is impressive and no one is impressionable. i have yet to meet someone worth talking to because usually it's all the mindless chatter about how hardcore my snakebites are and how scene my tattoo's are. don't get me wrong, i love tattoo's, i'm still waiting till i can get my next one. but i'm just so unimpressed with people who go around posting bulletins on myspace (who are all underage, might i add) saying THEY CAN'T WAIT TO GET MY SUPERSCENE AWESOMELY HARDCORE TATTOO WHICH WILL LOOK LIKE SHIT!!
it seems like no one gets tattoo's because they mean something anymore, i saw a girl with a john deere tattoo on her lower back.... WHAT THE FUCK? get a life, ink doesn't make you cool, ink signifies what's important to you. and if killwhitneydead's CD logo is important to you, then you need to rethink your life. be original.
on that note, my next tattoo is going to be cherry blossom's around a violin f-hole with some obscure phrase underneath. and it'll be on my feet. in your face sucker.
it seems like no one gets tattoo's because they mean something anymore, i saw a girl with a john deere tattoo on her lower back.... WHAT THE FUCK? get a life, ink doesn't make you cool, ink signifies what's important to you. and if killwhitneydead's CD logo is important to you, then you need to rethink your life. be original.
on that note, my next tattoo is going to be cherry blossom's around a violin f-hole with some obscure phrase underneath. and it'll be on my feet. in your face sucker.
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